Wednesday, January 24, 2007

an odd set of titles

well, every time a title prospect comes up, it seems as valid as the one preceding.
such titles;
how high can one grasp?
was it ever meant to be?
it was never meant to be.
among others, to convey multiple meanings, multiple ideas, stresses, emotions, well one should understand.
also, this is out of place. an abstarct reality, not one of virtuality. involving, dare i say, real people. these, including myself.
this contributes, naturally, to the incomprehensible nature of it also.

an image: you, being me, are fired from a canon, launched vertically into the sky as it appears; blue. well, why? to reach as high as you can of course. to attain that which you can attain.
so, at such high velocity you should be able to reach as high as is possible. set your goal in your sights, aspire to anything and it is reasonable.
there! there it is. a small redness, stark against the sky, glimpsed in the crooks of your outstretched fingers.
you follow? for this example, you are higher than normal, reaching for something. something like a heart.
before you know it, and long before you can begin to understand it, something has laid hold to you, pulling you back from your goal. was it too lofty to begin with? well, as this ethereal hand is pulling you down, pulling at your insides, you naturally feel this sinking feeling. such canons were never meant to give such hope; they will surely still be there when the ground looms, rushes up, and catches you in its unyeilding embrace. will you survive? hah. unlikely, to say the least.
so, you look back, or, back up rather. your fingers curling; as if they still wanted to grasp the thing, and all that stuff. and there is a redness on your fingers, almost as if you did indeed touch it!
it was close, but you've realised it was never within reach, you couldn't have grasped it from the moment you left the ground. on account of you? maybe it was too high, and naught to do with you.
so, what happens next? naturally you hit the ground. you aren't quite dead. not on the outside at least. will you ever hop back into the muzzle of the canons to try again? they are close enough beside you; after all that, you barely moved. barely moved from where you were first fired. but the canons are behind you. to stay? or will you go back and try again?

don't make me the one to answer this. i yet cannot.

sure, so this is an allegory, none of that virtuality stuff. its all quite weird anyway. too false to be learned from. so what is the lesson? what is the symbolism.
reality relates to what is real. it relates to life. the shades of gray, the how, the processes. a method to get you from point A to point B, whether in a physical sense or a logical process, or whatever. its about love, in essence, as love is the essence. in general. the direct article shows that it is at least the most important essence, at most the only essence.

what say you? now with other plagues on the mind, i must leave. i bid thee all...

Sunday, January 14, 2007

a specification

in the welcoming, i neglected to mention your role in this. should you come, bringing with you your presence you would come to be coupled with my desire to share what i have been processing, should this suit you.

taste testing

we shall see what is remembered of this endeavor, for it was recent but not adjacent in time.
i often observe from a vantage, a higher place with a good view. though this isn't symbolic; placing myself above others, simply a physical occurence, as such are so rare in Virtuality. now it makes me think of the lip of the Grand Canyon, gazing down on the valley below, yet somehow able to observe detail, fine edges, swift movement. they are playing down there as i watch. as i store up things to process.

ive been told there is a gorgeous little stream just to my left, i see vague depressions in the land where flows the water. crystal clear it is said, swam in by fish, etc. i had planned to go to it, to see it, and wonder at it. you know, there are a lot of supposedly wonderful, astounding things if only one would look. you are simply compelled to gape in awe, as if you should choose otherwise in lieu.
i dont know why i know this, but nonetheless it is there. such is knowledge in that place.

as i was saying, i had planned to observe this stream, yet the intrigue, the simple complexity of the rest of the Virtual world held me fast. so i contented myself to observe what i could. then i saw it! one of the virtual people a vast distance away made beckon to me. there were several, gallivanting a small distance from a populace of trees and other greenery. they were grinning like madmen, and i could hear it, come with us! you will enjoy it. they weren't actually saying it, but nonetheless i heard their message, and short of paralysis, nothing could detain me.

their contagious grins spread softly onto my face as we went towards the trees i mentioned. we're going to taste the fruit! it was exclaimed. a couple of them had turned towards me, still grinning. the rest drunk on whatever happiness they pursued before i came. yet one more, off to the side, a silent smile trying to plant itself on the shivering face. i wondered about the fruit, sure i have eaten real fruit, but this was going to be different. different! yes, i acknowledged. different.

whatever the cause, the first tree we came upon was gray, as if twilight were touching it though the light of the skies was in full. its fruit lay untouched, yet not fit even for consideration amongst its tangled roots. there are more trees. more fruit. just here. i didnt doubt for a second. the other trees were close by, ripe with fruit. even on a single tree was the fruit different, this one shaped so, or coloured differently than the next. this next one seemed to have the word "Wrongo" chiseled into its skin. i tried a few. some were bland, some filled with flavours such as i cant describe. try this one! i tried several. one most pleasant was a shell of luschious flesh, surrounding an empty core. i wondered at it, but not for long; it made sense. one fruit was so bitter i could barely keep it in my mouth, though i did swallow most of it. the others didnt mind it as much.

so we moved on, these next ones were bushes. on the way though i noticed an aftertaste of one of the fruits. as best as i can describe it it tasted like mourning the loss of something you've always known. as if the very spoken language was torn from our mouths and we could no longer use it without great shame. i remember it was one of the more bland fruits before, but the aftertase left me wondering, and i think i wanted another bite. just one more bite.

anyway, we then came to the bushes. some blended in with the sand i stared at between my feet as i had walked. its berries only reinforcing that. a grittiness on the tongue is what i remember. i tasted others, but only out of courtesy, i found them not very enjoyable. the virtual people around me were most silent this time.

the rest of my time spent there was unremarkable, but when i left to go, or come back as it were, to reality, i felt a sense of loss. intangible really, but it was such an enjoyable time that i would like to go there again. i might take you with me, before they grow some new trees.

such as reality is; my body lethargic, my mind weary and in slight unease, my shoulders tense from my posture... such is not the case in Virtuality. but we all have lives to live, unfortunately, or the opposite possibly, im just coming to grips with this; that i must do what has been set before me in reality, and learn the lessons of Virtuality. but such as reality is, i feel the need to sleep.

i bid you all a good night, that that which confuses you is eased, your questions sent on answering quests, your observing panoramic and your processing fruitful.